After getting request upon request upon request to add Facebook applications, I finally found one that has proved to be interesting. It’s called the Compare People app, and it does just that: compares people. Basically, anytime you go to the application, you get 50 matches of two of your friends on Facebook, and you tell them which one is, for example:

• more likely to win in a fight
• has a better taste in music
• more fashionable
• hotter
• someone you’d rather kiss

And the list goes on and on. The ratings all get tallied up, and in the end, you are awarded certain placement within your group of friends (and, privately, with your entire networks).

I just discovered this interesting application, so I had yet to see where my fellows on Facebook had placed me. When I looked, I was understanding, surprised, startled, and humbled. Here are some of the best:

The ones I assumed/hoped I could win

I spent a good deal of time perfecting profile pictures. It’s a hobby, right?

The ones I assumed I would lose

Yes. They’re all 0%— for a reason!

The ones I was greatly flattered by

I was actually told this first one the other day, and I don’t really get it, but I’m flattered nonetheless. However, some of these make absolutely no sense. Am I friends with four deaf people? Four odd-taste people? And who in their right mind called me cuddly? Have you seen how bony I am?

Finally, the ones that were out of the blue

The first one is just kind of odd. As far as the second one is concerned, I didn’t think that pre-schoolers could join Facebook, add this application, and get compared as such to me. And the last two– how the hell didn’t I win those? Huh?

This application really makes you think. Hard. About why you’d be such a great father, and how you can become crazier to clench the award.

I leave you with the following. Clearly I am the best father figure in all of Apple, Inc:

I just don’t get it…